| death, joy, and eternity |
[Dec. 1st, 2009|01:08 pm] |
The idea of eternity has been on my mind a lot lately. It all started when I was reflecting on the past few years and evaluating the redirection of my life. Everything I once was has been made new.
The reason for some of my life events is becoming more clear. After Kyle died I felt like I had a very surface level knowledge about why God would have something like this happen in my life. But looking back, I had no idea the extent to which this event would redirect my life. I trusted God fully, and I don’t ever remember being mad that He had taken away the most important person in my life, or ever really questioning why, but I wasn’t quite sure what He would have me do with this experience. I saw the amazing faith and grace that Kyle had through his experience and knew that God had something huge in mind for us both, even though we both knew it would inevitably end in Kyle’s death.
This search for meaning has led me to where I am now, and I’m sure it will continue to take me farther. It has been a long and hard road filled with much mourning, but I have learned to find joy even in the midst of hardship. Not that I am thankful for Kyle’s death, but I am in awe and so thankful for this incredible life-changing, painful, yet beautiful experience. Looking at my life now, I am shocked at how this one life event took everything I knew and took it in a completely different direction; everything in my life has changed because of it. It makes sense now. Why he was in my life for exact that amount of time. God's perfect timing led me here, to exactly where I am supposed to be.
I was talking to one of my patients the other day who will turn 100 this month. Talking to older patients is extremely interesting to me, and I am starting to grasp what it is like to wake up one day and feel like the same person, but not recognize the face in the mirror any more. Reflecting over the past 3 years since Kyle died and seeing how they have flown by, I realized the rest of life is going to go by just as fast. The brevity of life is starting to become very real to me. While talking to this patient, she told me she didn’t know if she would make it until her next birthday, but she did not seemed bothered at all by this statement. Although she could be facing weeks to live, she talked to me with a huge grin on her face. She seemed completely satisfied.
I recently started thinking about how God might perceive death, not that I can ever fathom what goes on in the mind of the creator of the universe, but this is the best that I can grasp it. I started realizing that God did not place something good in my life just to take it away; that I have been focusing on the loss rather than the gain from it. I started thinking about eternity as the length of a football field (not that eternity has a measurement, but I had to put it in some sort of fathomable human perspective) and a human life being just one millimeter of this length. In the scheme of things, it doesn’t matter if we live half a millimeter or a whole millimeter. The length of a human life is so insignificant when you look at all of eternity. All of life will look so small when we can finally grasp the expanse of what eternity truly is. The length of our human existance is not what matters, but what we choose to do with it. I pictured suddenly God thinking something like, “I know this will be hard for you, but I will do something with this for my glory.” What an amazing thing to realize!! That my suffering truly was for the glory of Christ. When I realized this, I knew that I would suffer this same thing 1,000 times more. That I am truly an instrument in the hand of God; that the beginning of true trust in God is the realization of how small you are in the scheme of things.
I truly am not my own.
I am here to serve.
I am finding the joy in my pain.
I am clearly seeing that all things truly work for good for those who love Him. |
|
|
| Mumbai, India. Days 26, 27, and 28. |
[Jul. 31st, 2009|11:13 pm] |
Well, this is it. My last day in India...for this trip at least.
The last few days have been pretty quiet and relaxing. Gotten a lot of reading done. Yesterday we headed to the leprosy referal clinic and spent a few hours there. It was actually pretty interesting and I got to watch a dressing change. They did however decide to spray for mosquitos while we were there which was a bit strange. The room was filled with a heavy cloud for about 15 minutes as I sat trying to concentrate on what the doctor was saying and breathing through my scarf. Later that night we went to the Cinemax and saw another Bollywood movie called "Love Aaj Kal" which means "Love Today Tomorrow". It actually turned out to be pretty good. It especially helped when my roommate came and sat next to me and translated some parts haha.
The only real interesting thing that has happened in the last few days was me eating a bunch of ants on accident. They were on a cookie that I picked up and I was too engrossed in my book to realize there were about 100 crawling all over it. They were in my teeth and on my tongue and I ran for my toothbrush and bottle of water as fast as I could. The expressions on my roommates faces were priceless.
As of now I am all packed and ready to go. About 5 more hours til I head for the airport! It's actually been quite sad packing up all my things. It's strange being so attached to this city, so familiar with it now, not knowing if I will ever return. But I'm definitely looking forward to returning to the pacific northwest weather. Even the rain storms there will now look like it's sprinkling.
This month has gone by sooooo fast! We were all discussing it the other night and I have decided that although it's been great, India herself has had even more to teach me than the program. I've learned an incredible amount about medicine, the culture, the human race, and most importantly, myself. Alhough it started roughly and has been frustrating at times, I wouldn't have traded this trip for the world.
I love you all at home and I'm looking forward to seeing everyone shortly! :]
<3 Becca |
|
|
| Mumbai, India. Days 24 and 25. |
[Jul. 30th, 2009|08:57 am] |
Tuesday morning we headed to Panvel for the rural rotation and what is going down in the books as one of my most interesting adventures yet.
Took about 2 hours to get there by train. I was pretty excited because we were staying at an alternative medicine center where I had heard you can get a massage and steam bath. We met the coordinator when we arrived and they drove us by jeep to a skin clinic where we spent a few hours. I had the doctor look at the strange markings on my hand and he thought possibly a spider bit or burn. He gave me a cream...we'll see how well it works. I was just glad it wasn't some strange disease. I think I've become the poster child for all the illnesses NOT to get while in India.
From there we headed to the rural clinic...this is where it got interesting. It started out well...Our guide for the day (also the yoga teacher there) introduced himself as Avinash. He handed us strong and richly sweet herbal tea made with ginger and lemon grass that were grown right there in the gardens. He then took us for a tour of the gorgeous, green 125 acre lot known as "Shantivan" which means "garden of peace". While this sounded amazing, it proved otherwise...
He showed us through the leprosy hospital, daycare, retirement and assisted living homes, and the alternative medicine center; the last of which we were staying at. Halfway through, we realized this guy was NUTS. At first we wondered if he was actually crazy or if he was a crotchety old man who just wanted to come off that way. Pretty sure the first assumption was true. An old man at the retirement home beckoned us to sit with him and tell a story; during the story our guide kept interrupting and prompting him and I wanted to tell him to shut up and let the poor old man talk! During our conversation he kept throwing in bits about his past and how he had seen strippers in Thailand or something like that...I couldn't follow. We were informed by other students later that he had been a drug addict for many years after his wife died and he originally came to Sahntivan for detox. We attempted to amuse him and keep up with his conversation, but I was on the verge of laughter the entire time. By the end of the tour we could not wait to get away from this guy! We said we would go to the dining room to eat with everyone but he insisted on bring food to us. So we sat in my room and he watched us eat in silence. He kept pointing to things and asking why we were not eating them. At the end when he collected the dishes he noticed I had soup left and asked me twice to eat it. I refused...I was tired of complying and felt a bit ornry. He shrugged and took it away and told us to be up by 6:30 for our massages in the morning. He then insisted on setting up our mosquito nets which I ended up taking down later because it was too hot to lay under...I did however get eaten alive...whoops.
I woke in the morning startled with my heart pounding. Our guide was outside POUNDING on my door and yelling. I thought it was some sort of emergency until I realized that he just wanted to know if I was awake. I looked at my phone...10 minutes before my alarm was set to go off. NOT a good way to start my morning. I yelled that I was up but he woutld not stop yelling and pounding on the door til I went and answered it. I glared and him and he asked me if I wanted tea. I said yes and closed the door. We decided to meet him at the main house instead of him coming back to our rooms. We sat on the porch and sipped our herbal tea, relaxed and enjoyed the peaceful green wilderness. There was a river a couple hundred yards from us that you could hear...perfect. Suddenly I look over and our guide has kicked and old man out of his chair so he could plug in a tape player. He puts in a tape, walks over to me, hits me with the cassette cover, hands it to me, and walks away. The music started just as I looked down to see what I was holding..."Superhits of Brittney and Whitney" whith a big picture of Whitney Houston smiling at me. Not only was this the worst of the 80's, but he had it blaring SO loud that I'm pretty sure everyone on the property was awake. I thought it was some sort of joke at first and then realized he was enjoying the music. It was like a scene out of a movie. I just sat there, stunned, drinking my tea.
Then it was off to our massages. It was a bit strange. They massage and lather you with oil and then put you in a steam bath. The lady wanted to take a picture of me in the steam bath...it was extremely difficult to explin how to use my camera when she didn't speak English and I couldn't use my hands! After this they scrub you down with soap which gets about half the soap off of you. Quite an interesting experience I must say.
After this we ran back to our rooms and packed as fast as we could. There was no way we were staying another night here with this weirdo. He didn't put up much of an arguement, which I was a bit surprised at. He wanted us to leave comments their book and read everything we wrote over our shoulders and kept saying "say good things about me! say the rooms were clean!". I didn't write anything about him.
Then we toured a hospital operation theatre and got there just in time to see....nothing. No operations that day. So they sat us in a room and gave us tea. We waited half an hour before asking what we were waiting for. They said nothing...so we left. This place is so strange!!
Since we came back a day early, we had no plans today, so me and my roommate spent the day in a local market which actually turned out to be awesome. At lunch I tried something called a "falooda" which consists of ice cream, jello, pistachios, noodles, and some sort of seed that has the texture of tapioca. The weirdest and yet greatest thing ever. Definitely not trying to repeat that recipe when I get home though.
<3 Becca |
|
|
| Delhi and Agra, India. Days 21, 22, and 23. |
[Jul. 27th, 2009|02:05 pm] |
I'm not sure how to even start this entry. It was possibly the most epic weekend of my life. But let me start at the beginning...
We boarded our flight to Dehli. Not once was my ID or passport checked...not during check-in, not in security, and not in boarding the plane. And these people wonder how they get terrorists... Anyway the flight went smoothly. It was incredible looking down during takeoff and seeing millions of tarps in the slums that looked like tiny blue dots everywhere.
After about 2 hours we finally arrived and we got a taxi to take us to the train station in Paharganj (supposedly our hotel was near there.) We showed up to what was possibly the most sketchy part of any town I have ever seen. I later read in the guide book that "with its seedy reputation for drugs and dodgy characters, this area isn't everyones cup of tea". Greaaaaat. So instead of wandering around on these streets we decided to ditch our reservation and check in to the least sketchy looking hotel on the block. It turned out to be alright. About 5 minutes after we settled in a man came in and started spraying something everywhere and explained that it was room spray. I was picturing the movie "Hostel" where we somehow get drugged by this spray and dragged away to our deaths. Turned out he was just trying to make it smell good...very strange. We ordered some food and I got the chicken which actually turned out to be delicious. I opted out of eating the last piece however when I found a feather on it. My roommate assured (while laughing) that this just meant that it was very fresh.
We got up at 5am and headed to the train station which was a convenient 2 minute walk from the hotel. They played the weirdest music on the train...the only way I can describe it is 80's instructional video music. So bad. About 2 hours later we arrived in Agra and were bombarded by taxi and rikshaw drivers (as usual). We settled for a guy who offered to take us around all day for a pretty fair price. This man was Ali, the singing tour guide. Amazing. There were cows everywhere! Even more than in Mumbai. They just hang out on the streets and love to block traffic.
Ali:
Our first stop was the mini Taj which was built 25 years before the big one. Thety gave us little shoe covers to wear when we went in which I thought was kind of funny, but it was better than going barefoot as usual. From here we went to a viewpoint of the Taj and a local kid took some funny pics of us with the Taj in the background. As I was walking down the street a bunch of cows came up next to me and I asked my friend to take a pic. Right as he snapped the pic one of the cows decided he didn't like me being that close and headbutted me out of the way. Best pic everrrr.
Mini Taj:
Taj Mahal:
Headbutted by a cow:
Then we headed to the Agra Fort which is made of red sandstone and has lots of mosques and gardens inside. It was scorching hot outside, hovering just above 100 degrees and still very humid. My stomach started getting a little weird around this time but I attributed it to taking my anti-malarials on an empty stomach. From here we went to a pretty nice (yet cheap) restaurant for lunch. After eating a few bites of lamb my stomach did not agree with, I had to run to the bathroom. Then we headed to a place where tapestries and jewelry are made for a tour. I tried to take some pics but mostly had to concentrate on not puking on the tour guide. They were very hospitable and offered me some lemon water but it didn't seem to help. So when we left I decided to get a hotel room for a bit and lay down while the others continued the tour.
Agra Fort:
We arrived at a dingy little place but I didn't care, I just needed to lay down. The first room they showed me didn't have a bathroom and was simply out of the question. On the way down to the second room I started feeling sick again. As soon as they opened the door I ran straight past the guy to the toilet. Afterward I walked out to see that it was a bright pink room, no windows or AC, with half the paint peeled off the walls and strange brown smudges everywhere. I was too tired to think about it and laid on the bed (which consisted of a piece of wood and a blanket) and passed out to the sound of a squeeky ceiling fan and a generator outside. They came back for me after about 2 hours and although I was still feeling pretty sick, I had come all this way and was determined to see the Taj Mahal!
Classy hotel I spent a few hours sleeping/puking in:
When we got there, I got asked at least 100 times (literally) to take pictures with people. They only thing we could figure out was that people love red hair here. One lady even sat her kid on my lap for a picture. It was the strangest thing. After seeing the inside of the dome of the Taj I was waiting outside for the others when my stomach got uneasy again. I ran through people to the bottom of the stairs on the lower platform where I spotted a garbage can. The lid wouldn't come off. So I attempted to puke into it sideways. Good thing I had my foot covers on because it was everywhere.
I managed to make it all the way back to the hotel without puking and I have been fine since then! The next day we spent in Delhi and saw the Jama Masjid (built by the same guy that built the Taj). It is the biggest mosque in India and can hold 25,000worshippers. We got there just as they were starting prayers and had to wait about an hour to go in. On of the guys working kept chasing people away with a large stick. I thought this to be a strange contrast to the Christian church who is supposed to be welcoming of anyone who comes to the door. We had to cover any bare limbs which was very uncomfortable considering the tremendous heat. After this we saw the India Gate, built in memorial of the 90,000 Indian soldiers that died in WWI. Then we headed to the Gandhi Smriti; this was the place that Gandhi was shot and killed in 1948, and where he spent the last 144 days of his life.
Then we headed to the airport and headed back home to Mumbai. Again, no checking of the ID! So strange. It was a weird feeling coming back to what was now a familiar city, and a relief to see things I recognized.
This morning we went to Ashray, an orphanage that specializes in kids with HIV/AIDS. The kids were so cute and I definitely wish I could have spent more time there. I wanted to take one home with me! :]
<3 Becca |
|
|
| Mumbai, India. Days 19 and 20. |
[Jul. 24th, 2009|12:07 pm] |
This city is unbelievable. There are 48,000 people per square kilometer. More than half the population lives in slums and cannot feed their family more than once a day. The poor live off of about $2 a month. The air is heavy with autorikshaw fumes, I can feel my lungs blacken every time I step outside. These streets are filthy. Filled with garbage, animals, feces and urine. Then the heavy rains come and flood everything and we all trapse through it. No wonder people are so weird about what their shoes touch here. It would be unthinkable to want to touch your own feet here let alone someone else's. This place has brought a whole new meaning to the scene in the Bible where the woman washes Jesus' feet. It makes a whole lot more sense why that would be seen as such a gracious act.
As much as I have hated being in such a filthy, smelly, overrun city, it has grown on me. I have to admit that I will be a little sad to leave.
Went to the National Park here yesterday and went on a "safari" where we saw some tigers and a lion. It lasted like 5 minutes and we just drove through on a bus...best 75 cents I've ever spent. The rainforest was beautiful and the Kanheri caves were amazing...built in the 1st century by monks!
We took our cook, Sagar, out to dinner last night as a thank you before a few people from the program left. He lives with us 24/7 and makes all the meals...sometimes in shifts because we are all in and out at different times. He does an amazing job. Every time I walk in I am greeted with a cup of hot chai tea...he definitely spoils us. We went to Trishna; I'm really going to miss the most delicious and cheap restaurant in the world. It might be worth visiting this city again just to eat there.
Headed to Delhi this afternoon to see the Taj Mahal and to get some fresher air in these lungs.
<3 Becca |
|
|
| Mumbai, India. Days 17 and 18. |
[Jul. 22nd, 2009|03:26 pm] |
Yesterday I went to go buy minutes for my phone. The guy that usually works wasn't there and the guy that was, was telling me that he couldn't do it. As I'm trying to make out what he is telling me in very broken English, a man walked up and handed me little white-ish looking pebbles. (I later asked out cook what they were and he simply picked one out of my hand and ate it. I followed suit.) While I'm staring at these trying to figure out what he has just handed me, he said something in Hindi and brought a small red stick toward my face. I freaked out for a second and then realized that he had just placed a small red dot of dye between my eyes. Then he grabbed my wrist and tied red string around it. I realized that I had just been blessed. Then he hit me up for money. Then he asked for more because evidently what I gave him wasn't enough. I'm sure glad Jesus doesn't charge for His blessings...
This morning we went to the Vilmala Dermatological Centre. It is pretty much a modern day leper colony that is run by nuns. They provide all kinds of services such as surgeries and physical therapies. Everyone was so warm and welcoming. The patients were all so excited that we were there. They all waved and smiled as we walked by. They had gardens and courtyards (which is extremely rare here); pretty much an oasis where people could seek refuge. They also run a school. They select the kids from the poorest families in the area and run it like a boarding school. They live in amazing conditions and also get a great aducation. This is definitely a place that I would have loved to spend more time at. To me this place was a ray of hope in a dark city. There is hope afterall.
<3 Becca |
|
|
| Mumbai, India. Days 14, 15, and 16. |
[Jul. 20th, 2009|12:01 pm] |
After breakfast on Saturday we took the train down to Mahalaxmi where we saw where all the people in the slums do their laundry, it was actually really neat! After this we headed to the floating temple. It sits out on its own little island in the water just connected by a bridge.
Then we headed to Churchgate to see the Elephant caves. Turns out we were too late so we ended up hiring a tour guide for a few hours to drive us around. He took us to the beach here and down Marine Drive. Here we were asked by some locals to take pictures with them like we were some sort of celebrities. From here we headed to a Jain's Temple. It was so beautiful! This is a strange sect of Hunduism that believes you cannot eat anything that kills it to be harvested (ex: garlic, carrots). However they can eat things like apples because the tree still lives even when the fruit is harvested. Some of the more extreme people of this religion wear masks so as to not accidently swallow flies and other bugs.
Chowpatty Beach:
Jain Temple:
From here we went to the hanging gardens...not too eventful or impressive...and then drove past the "Tower of Silence". Evidently dead bodies are brought here and the vultures eat them. This still goes on today. We ended this tour with Ghandi's house and then spent about an hour searching for Trishna (that amazing restaurant that we ate at last week). Hillary Clinton was in town and her guards arrived at the restaurant to cancel her reservations...darn, so close to seeing her in person!
On the way home our train broke down and after about 20 minutes of sitting there, people started bailing out the sides. So we did the same; jumped down on to the tracks and ran down a ways where we jumped a fence. After watching people take a dump on these tracks I was not too excited about this adventure. We caught a taxi but the streets were majorly backed up because the trains were down. We decided to check out the next station and sure enough we were able to catch a super crowded train home! What a trip.
Escaping from the train:
The next day we barely made it to Churchgate in time, but managed to catch a boat out to the Elephanta Islands and saw the caves! Not super amazing, but I'm glad we went. There were monkeys everywhere that were super viscious! Watched one attack a girl and steal her bag of grapes. Probably my favortite part of the trip :]
<3 Becca
"But as for me, I will hope continually, and will praise You yet more and more." Psalm 71:14 |
|
|
| Mumbai, India. Days 12 and 13. |
[Jul. 17th, 2009|04:32 pm] |
Watched a cleft palate reconstructions yesterday. Allllmost as amazing as the c-sections. They had the girl's lip cut in 2 and pulled up all the way to her eyes. Her face was pretty much pulled off up over her nose and you could see into her sinuses. SO NEAT. THe roof of her mouth was dissected and created a closed palate using the buccal fat pads to close off the sides. They did a bone graft from her anterior iliac spine to her maxilla. This was super intense and involved a hammer and chisel. The end result was amazing. We were there for the entire 4 hours it took leaning over the surgeon's shoulder as he explained what he was doing. Such a great experience.
I also got to watch a total knee replacement and elbow reconstruction through the window in the surgeon's lounge. These procedures had much to high of risk for infection for us to be in the room for them.
Spent today in the DOTS clinic. Nothing super exciting but I did get to see a lot of interesting cases of tuburculosis. And then they gave us indian ice cream...totally worth the visit!
On a lighter note, me and another program participant have invented a new sport: extreme sudoku. It's done in a rikshaw during intense heat in the middle of terrible traffic on the bumpiest roads of Mumbai. You might think ist sounds alright, but wait til you try to concentrate with all that going on in the background.
I have been thumbing through some phrase books and I'm always a little amused at what they choose to put in there. As if you can say these phrases and then be alright in the conversation from there on out without knowing any Hindi...
For example: "maing kaa-leen kee du-kaan par na-heeng ruk-naa chaah taa" meaning "this is not the place that I wanted to go." Just try saying that to a rikshaw driver and see what his reaction is...you'll be thumbin through your little book faster than ever to try and translate what he is yelling at you.
Oher useful phrases for India also include "paas-port ko ga yaa" meaning "I've lost my passport", "jaa-o" meaning "go away!", and "pet meng dard hay" which means "My stomach hurts."
<3 Becca |
|
|
| Mumbai, India. Day 11. |
[Jul. 15th, 2009|04:59 pm] |
So we went in this morning expecting to watch cleft palate surgery...which would have been fascinating. But the doctor was in another surgery on the cardiac floor that was taking a while so we waited around and eventually left to go get lunch. When we got back we were told the other surgery was still going and the cleft palate would be put off until tomorrow. So instead we got to watch c-sections. THIS WAS THE MOST AMAZING THING I HAVE EVER SEEN. Not only did I get my blood and gut fix, but I got to be present when 2 new lives were brought into this world. I'm thinking maybe I should go into delivery nursing.
The second one was a bit scary because they all started talking loudly (I didn't understand what they were saying) and running around with panicked faces, and another doctor was called to scrub in. I tried to glue myself against the wall and just stay out of the way. They finally got the baby out, who was looking a little bluish. After a few minutes they finally got it to cry and everything turned out alright. Phew.
What an amazing day!
<3 Becca
"The fear of the Lord is the instruction for wisdom, and before honor comes humility." Proverbs 15:33 |
|
|
| Mumbai, India. Day 10. |
[Jul. 14th, 2009|06:35 pm] |
Started off in the free clinic this morning in the hospital on the main floor in the casualty room. Services are free from 9-noon and then payment is based off of income after that. So you can imagine it gets pretty busy with everyone trying to get there while it's still free. I'm starting to get the idea that all the doctors here have the same attitude...it's worse than the US that's for sure. They don't like questions (unless it gives them a chance to show off), they don't like to be challenged, and they are ALWAYS right.
This just about describes the doctor we worked with the first hour this morning. He shrugged off most of our questions and ignored us most of the time. We watched some stitches be done and then decided we were unwanted and headed up to the operation theatre. SO much more awesome. Watched a ovarian cyst removal and a cleft lip surgery. It's so amazing being in the room like 3 feet from the patient!
The casualty room:
Hanging out in the surgeon's lounge:
After this we headed up to the cardiac floor again for some more observation in the cath lab. All the nurses were very excited to have us back. We were able to watch them perform an angioplasty which was actually really cool.
Headed home for a relaxing evening now to prepare for some more work at the hospital tomorrow!
<3 Becca
p.s. These monsoons are crazyyyy! The train stations were completely flooded today. |
|
|
| Goa and Mumbai, India. Days 7, 8 and 9. |
[Jul. 13th, 2009|07:09 am] |
I have been SO sick the last few days. Pretty sure I had a sinus infection. Took an overnight train to Goa on friday; we slept on hard, plastic bunks and you needed to pay extra for bedding so we opted out and used our backpacks as pillows. We stopped many times during the night and new passengers got on. Every 5 minutes or so a salesman would walk around and shout "coffee! masala milk! bahnee!!" so this made for a few rude awakenings. I'm just glad I didn't have a bottom bunk because random people would sit on your bunk while you were trying to sleep. I woke up at one point to a bunch of yelling and a security guard shoving several people off the train. Between being sticky, not being able to breathe through my nose, my sinus headache, people staring at me while I was trying to sleep, and the random yelling, it turned out to be the trainride from HELL. I was so glad to finally make it to our hotel.
Overnight train:
I slept from when we arrived at around 2pm through the night. My roommate brough me some mystery anti-pyretics given to her at the front desk. They took away my fever and body aches within a few hours. Whatever they were, I wanted more haha. Ate an AMAZING 5-star breakfast with every kind of food imaginable. Lounged around the pool the next day but somehow managed to get a bad sunburn even when it was overcast. That night we took another overnight train which was a little better experience than the last one, but I still think I will choose to fly next time we travel anywhere now.
Hotel room:
Pool:
When we stepped off the train this morning we were bombarded by herds of taxi drivers. We found a group of rikshaws (which we wanted to take because they are less expensive) but no one would use the meter...which essentially means that they want to rip you off. We got in and out of several once they refused to use it, taxi drivers STILL following and yelling at us. One of the drivers grabbed one of the girl's arms in the group and she started yelling at him...I very much wanted to do the same but somehow managed to control myself. This went on for about 10 minutes before some guy offered to use his meter finally. We finally made it home thinking this guy was a saint, and then he refused to give us exact change...figures. For the first time today I really hate this place. Or maybe I just hate what people have been reduced to. I really don't think there is one honest person left in this city. It makes me sad that people are so greedy and have no pride in what they do. Living in such poverty really reduces people to animals.
Today we were in the BSES hospital here in Mumbai. We received "spitirual counseling" when we first arrived where they exlaied that the hospital is based on "healing touch". They use medicine, but believe that meditation plays a huge role in healing both on the part of the patient as well as the care provider. They described it as looking inward to yourself and managing your thoughts (mind over matter), and then looking to God as fuel for your soul. They teach this to all staff and patients here, not matter their religion. They even have meditation rooms set aside that they encourage the staff to use before begnning work. We sure could use this were I work...
We spent most of our time on the cardiac floor observing angiograms with a femoral artery entry. The heart is so fascinating! All the nurses were so excited to meet "an american nurse" haha. On thursday we will get to observe a heart valve replacement so I am super excited about that. Flip flops and barefeet are a common sighting in the oporating room, this was quite funny to me.
In the cath lab on the cardiac floor:
Today was definitely a turning point. WIth being sick and miserable the last 5 days or so I was ready to give up and come home. I now feel that I am actually here for something. I'm excited to see what this next week brings!
Hope all is well at home. Love you all.
Someone special gave me this verse today and it is just what I needed :]
"Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. For consider Him who has endured such hostility by sinners against Himself, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart."
Hebrews 12:1-3
<3 Becca |
|
|
| Mumbai, India. Days 5 and 6. |
[Jul. 10th, 2009|12:37 pm] |
IT'S SO HOT. After lecture yesterday me and another person in my group decided to stay around the area that our clinicls were in so that we didn't have to take the train all the way home and back again. Walking in this heat and humidity is intense. We checked out some local shops....no postcards in sight though :[
2 nights ago we went on another house call where a single mother and her son and mother all lived together. We all sat around on their giant bed (I'm sure they all sleep together) and were served peach iced tea and cookies while the doctor examined the grandmother. The boy was playing guitar for us and one of the few songs he knew was "Fix You" by Coldplay, one of my favorites!! They were all extremely hospitible and I kept thinking that nothing like this would ever happen in the US, especially on a house call.
Nothing extremely exciting in clinicals so far. Had some cases of malaria and anal fissures but that's as about exciting as it gets. I was told I could observe some open heart surgeries next week in the hospital so I'm really looking forward to that!
Not feeling too well. Just a sore throat and runny nose...think I'll live. Decongestant doesn't seem to exist here though. I'll keep looking.
SO excited to head to Goa tonight and get out of this hectic city for a while and just relax and lay on the beach or swim in the pool. I think I would go insane if I lived here.
<3 becca |
|
|
| Mumbai, India. Day 4. |
[Jul. 8th, 2009|04:20 pm] |
I forget how weird people are about shoes here. We have to take our shoes off every time we enter a home or business, even the doctor's office. I was scolded by a woman on the train car yesterday for having my feet on the seat in front of me. The entire train car was EMPTY, mind you, but she sat down on the exact seat that I had my feet on and just stared at me with a glare on her face. We sat in this awkward position for about 15 minutes before the train finally took off. I wanted to tell her that that I was sure her rear was nastier than my shoes due to the lack of toilet paper in her country but something told me to keep my mouth shut. Probably for the better. She then proceeded to buy roasted peanuts from a man who was continually wiping sweat from his forehead and then used the same hand to scoop the nuts into a paper cup which he handed to her. Then she spit into a washcloth which she put back in her purse. Yes lady, you were right. I am the unsanitary one here.
Headed to Goa this weekend for a mini vacation. It's about an 11 hour train ride south of Mumbai. Supposed to have AMAZING beaches according to everything I have read and heard. We are staying in a 5 star resort for $25 a night. Gosh dang I love India.
The train station was too flooded this morning for the rikshaws to take us there so lecture was cancelled. Gotta love monsoon season! So instead we went to the local mall and saw a Bollywood movie titled "Kambakkht Ishq" which roughly translates to "crazy love". It involved much singing and dancing and had a rediculous plot line like most Bollywood movies. There were random English phrases thrown in here and there which I found amusing. Definitely want to see another one of these movies before I leave.
Flooding:
Movie theatre:
I don't think I will ever get used to the shock at the level of poverty here. 55% of people live in slums. The average daily income in Mumbai is $2.40 which is MUCH higher than the national average, but still barely enough to feed yourself. After coming out of the mall where designer shoes are sold I am hit with the realization that people are sleeping just outside on the sidewalks and covered in flies, looking like they havent eaten in months. The cast system here is insane and the 2 worlds literally collide. They are poor people living in a rich country.
Lessons learned:
1. When you buy a soda in a glass bottle, you are expected to finish the drink and the give the bottle back. Do not attempt to walk away with the bottle.
2. Men can hold hands and put their arms around each other here and it does not mean that they are gay. However the finger swag and lisp are not just an American thing, it happens here too.
3. There is no such thing as addresses or street names here. Know your landmarks.
4. Apparently it is perfectly acceptable to pick wedgies in public.
5. You have to stand when national anthem is played at the beginning of movies?
Love and miss you all back at home.
<3 becca
p.s. here are my verses of the day:
"Who will separate us from the love of Christ? WIll tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famile, or nakedness, or peril or sword?...But in all these things we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loves us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Jesus Christ our Lord."
Romans 8:25-39 |
|
|
| Mumbai, India. Day 3. |
[Jul. 7th, 2009|05:19 pm] |
I'm currently down in Churchgate, which is at the very southern tip of Mumbai in a little internet cafe. These things are awesome.
The doctor's office I worked in last night was smaller than my bedroom...very surprised by this. But real estate is extremely expensive here. Got to examine some patient. Very surprised that they are letting us jump right in! I also got to go with the doctor I am shadowing on some house calls. Both households were extremely hospitable.
Dr. Bathla's Clinic:
Today we ate in a fantastic seafood restaurant called Trishna. I ate some great lobster and chicken fried rice as well as cheese naan for 500 rupees (about 10 dollars...amazing!)
Getting used to the train and rikshaw rides. I have learned to be a little pushy...which is socially acceptable here. You just need to walk with confidence I have found. If you wanna cross the street, you go for it, and don't look back!
Some random pics I have been taking:
More to come soon! Love you all.
<3 becca |
|
|
| Mumbai, India. Days 1 and 2. |
[Jul. 6th, 2009|02:58 pm] |
Well, after 26 hours of travel time I finally made it. My first impression: for people who appear to be quite religious they are quite pushy and self-centered. The social norms are extremely different than the US. Being stared at was funny at first but is now just annoying.
I have decided that driving is an art here that takes many years to perfect. The horn is used more often than the brakes and I'm not sure why they even bothered installing turn signals. Just remember to lay on the horn every 5 seconds, drive 2 inches behind the person in front of you, and disregard any lane lines and you'll be fine. Also, if you feel like making a 2 way street into a one way street or driving 6 across in a 4 lane street, go for it. Despite all this craziness I have yet to see an accident.
Some usual traffic on the streets here:
We are staying in a suburb of Mumbai called Oshiwara, which is supposedly one of the nicest neighborhoods in town. There always seems to be the lingering smell of garbage though. The people here have a very distinct smell as well; one I can only describe as a mixture of incense, curry, and BO. Our living space consists of a small 12th floor apartment that has 4 bedrooms and 4 bathrooms, a living room, and a kitchen. There is a guy that lives with us that works for the program we are with. He cooks all the food for us and is there 24/7 in case we need anything.
Me in the neighborhood I'm staying in:
The view from my bedroom window:
Sagar, our cook:
There is no hot water but that's alright considering the heat and humidity outside. It is RELENTLESS. It is the same day and night. My roommate and I have decided that the only way to survive the night is to set the AC to the lowest it will go and blast it all night long. Otherwise you wake up feeling like you are suffocating. Thank goodness we even have AC. I washed my hair and evem after 10 hours it still wasn't dry...everything here is sticky feeling. We have turned our room into a small oasis where things actually dry sometimes if we keep the air on. But as soon as you step foot into the living area it is like sauna.
Here's my bedroom:
We traveled to Churchgate yesterday and went to the Taj Hotel where the terrorits attacks happened last fall. It was a completely different world after coming off the street. There were ladies in the bathroom that turn the water off and on for you and hand you a linen towel after you wash your hands. Definitely not used to that kind of thing. It was so strange to look out the windows and see all the poverty and to be 100 yards away being treated with such service. The class system is incredibly weird. We got caught in some rain on our way back home. You can feel the air get even thicker before the rain falls and it gets hard to breathe. I'm sure I looked amazing in my bright green poncho (thanks mom); as if I don't get enough weird looks as it is.
This is me and my roommate, Sidrah:
And this is the "Gateway to India" down in Churchgate:
Note to self: ALWAYS ride the women's car on the train; it's awkward enough riding sardine-style with a bunch of people of the same gender. Trains are an experience in itself. I swear these people were former football players the way they push to get off and on. If it's not your stop, hang on for you life so that you don't get swept out the door in the stampede. If the train has already started to leave, no worries, the doors stay open and you can jump on. The other people will help pull you on. I know this from several personal experiences now. Also, there are no such thing as lines...you push your way to the front to buy a train ticket. First come, first served.
Women waiting for the train:
I have found that I like the Indian way of crossing streets. The "right of way" does not exist here in any form. Just walk, even if there are cars coming, they'll slow down...sometimes. Just dodge and weave out of traffic and hope that those buses see you. We take rikshaws to get most places; they are small 3-wheeled cars. Kind of like bumper cars; they are driven like bumper cars too. Traffic here is the most insane thing I have ever seen. We are constantly inches away from busses, pedestrians, and other rikshaws. I feel like I am playing mario kart 64 every time we travel. I would not reccommend this way of traveling if you get car sick easily.
Our meals consist of raw vegetables (carrots, cucumbers, and tomatoes), a spicy soup called dal (which you also have the option of pouring over rice), some sort of spicy vegetables and beans mashed up with chick peas, and tortilla-like bread called chipote that you use to scoop everyting up with. It's quite good, but I can tell that it's going to get old fast. I also now realize why people here are so thin.
Typical meal at our home:
Had lecture this morning about the infrastructure of the medical system here, and clinicals start tonight. My group is headed to one of the clinics in the slum. I'll update more about how that goes later.
Lecture with Dr. Bahtki:
Lessons learned so far:
1. Don't smile at strangers.
2. Don't be afraid to push your way through crowds or traffic, or elseyou won't get anywhere.
3. Don't respond to salesmen in any way.
4. ALWAYS have toilet paper on you, it is not always available.
5. Make sure that the rikshaw meter is running or they WILL cheat you.
6. The kids might look cute, but they are really just well trained. mom is lurking, watching, and waiting for you to give them money.
For now I will leave you with some verses that have been on my mind:
Psalm 55:22 and Psalm 143:10
Hope everyone at home is well, and I miss and love you all.
Love, Becca |
|
|
| 2 Corinthians 5:6-8 |
[Jun. 6th, 2009|04:31 pm] |
i have been praying about a lot of things lately that have not turned out so well (at least in my mind). not that God did not answer my prayers, but rather he just replied with a 'no'.
i think it's silly when we say "God answered my prayers." of course He did, He ALWAYS answers. sometimes just not right away, or with the answer we want to hear.
but i am learning to accept His no's with joy, KNOWING that all things work together for good for those who love Him.
sometimes it can feel like i am a rat in a maze.
but i will continue to seek the light. because i believe it is better to make mistakes made in faith than not walk by faith at all.
it is out of my hands, but it feels good. i would rather have it be in God's hands than mine, that's for sure. |
|
|
| आत्मसमर्पण |
[Jun. 3rd, 2009|12:34 pm] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | The Stand by Hillsong United | ] |
i found myself complaining about stupid things last night. i caught myself and realized how rediculous i sounded. i have the most amazing and supportive friends in the world, a family who loves me, a bed to sleep in, and the opportunity to travel and go to school. and although school weighs me down sometimes...what an AMAZING gift i've been given to be able to help people. what more could i possibly ask for??
EVERYTHING i have been given has come from my God who has blessed me SO much more than i deserve. i am so incredibly thankful for the life i have been given and the people in it.
no matter how hard life gets, i know He loves me constantly with the deepest love possible. and that's all i need to know.
"i’ll stand with arms high and heart abandoned, in awe of the One who gave it all. i’ll stand my soul Lord to You surrendered, all I am is Yours." |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[May. 13th, 2009|11:07 am] |
|
if i could go back, there are a lot of bridges i would un-burn. |
|
|
| 4 letter words |
[May. 6th, 2009|03:55 pm] |
I've been thinking a lot about love lately. What the definition of love truly is, what Jesus meant when He said to love your neighbor, and how I can apply this to my life every day. The verse from 1 Corinthians has come to my mind a lot: "But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love."
I'm sitting here reading my nursing textbook and supposed to be able to define the key words in the chapter. The books defines faith as "our ongoing effort to make sense of out life and purpose for being," hope as "our basic human need to achieve, create, and to shape something of our life to endure," and love as "a trade; we extend our love because we hope to find that love returned in some way."
What a bunch of horse crap!!
Faith is not merely making sense of things, but a deeply rooted sense of confidence in God!! It's a trusting acceptance that He holds out lives, including our future in His hands! Hope is not simply a basic human need, but something learned through faith! Hope comes from knowing that we are safe in God's hands and KNOWING that all things to work together for good to those who love Him! And love, my gosh, IS not and SHOULD not be given on the basis of hoping that it will be returned. Jesus didn't show us love based on the idea that it would be fully returned. But He did it anyway! Loving your neighbor is HARD most of the time, and there is no guarantee that the love will be returned. But Jesus asks us to love anyway.
To me, love is choosing the higher good for that person, even if it is detrimental to yourself. It is giving up your own wants and needs to put the other person first. Sure, it is easier to love some than others, but love is a choice.
This last year has been incredible for me in the ways that I have grown and come to understand these concepts. I am learning to turn the other cheek; to put my pride and selfishness aside; and to love those who are unloving. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Apr. 5th, 2009|11:16 pm] |
|
so i start nursing school tomorrow. this is definitely a new chapter in my life. it's been amazing to see how many doors have been opened in my life recently. i pray that God would allow me to not only help people physically, but be a genuine servant of God throughout all aspects of this career. i want all that i do to be to His glory. i ask that He would continue to give me passion for nursing as well as perseverance for what is to come. |
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
| |
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
liquidshad0ws's journal